Rules of Relaxation teaches 130 ways to relax so that you can deal with stress without being distressed.

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Free Chapter from Rules of Relaxation

A

Avoid Alcohol

Who has woe?

Who has sorrow?

Who has contentions?

Who has complaints?

Who has wounds without cause?

Who has redness of eyes?

Those who linger long at the wine, those who go in search of mixed wine.

Do not look on the wine when it is red, when it sparkles in the cup, when it swirls around smoothly; At the last it bites like a serpent, and stings like a viper.

Your eyes will see strange things, and your heart will utter perverse things. Yes, you will be like one who lies down in the midst of the sea, or like one who lies at the top of the mast saying: “They have struck me, but I was not hurt; they have beaten me, but I did not feel it. When shall I awake, that I may seek another drink?” (Proverbs 23:29-35)

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B

Breathe Deeply

Abdominal breathing is a very simple but effective relaxation technique for reducing stress. It involves taking a deep breath through your nose until you feel your abdomen rising and then exhaling completely until you feel your abdomen falling. Repeat several times and you will begin to feel relaxed as it slows your racing heart and calms your raging emotions.

It is discrete and can be done anywhere. Breathe deeply in traffic jams, at the office, in the middle of an argument or when you need to think clearly and perform efficiently under pressure.

I believe that part of the reason that exercising and crying and laughing help people who are stressed feel better is because they all involve deep abdominal breathing therefore take deep breaths whenever stress strikes.

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C

Count Your Blessings

An attitude of gratitude is very important in Christian stress management since it reminds you of the great things that God has done for you in the past and this serves as proof that He is still able to do other great things for you in your present and future including resolving your stressful situation for He is still the same great God.

Therefore, make it a habit to count your blessings instead of counting your hassles.

Each day write down three things that you are grateful for so that when the going gets tough, you can read your gratitude lists for encouragement.

Go the extra step and emulate David who carried God’s wonderful works etched in his heart. This helped him when he faced Goliath because he was able to remind himself that The Lord, who delivered me from the paw of the lion and from the paw of the bear, He will deliver me from the hand of this Philistine (1 Samuel 17:37) and this confidence in God’s power enabled him to fight fearlessly.

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D

Do Not Procrastinate

Do not say to your neighbor, “Go and come back tomorrow and I will give it to you then” when you have it with you. (Proverbs 3:28)

Do not postpone what you can do right now since chronic procrastination increases frustration, guilt and stress as the workload piles up.

To overcome procrastination, identify what makes you postpone work. Is it fear of the job, too many responsibilities, perfectionism or poor time management?

Then eradicate the causes of your procrastination before you undertake your next assignment.

If it is a big one, break it down into smaller tasks that you can finish easily. Tackle each task and then reward yourself after completing it to motivate yourself until you have successfully finished the entire assignment.

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E

Escape For A While

Now in the morning, having risen a long while before daylight, Jesus went out to a solitary place and prayed. (Mark 1:35)

You need to escape everyday to a solitary place where you can pray. Try and escape for an hour in the morning or when you are least likely to be disturbed. Escape preferably to a place that is physically away from your stressors. This solitary place can be your bedroom, your office, or a church.

If you are not able to physically escape to a solitary place, you can mentally escape to a solitary space in your mind. Tune out the world and tune in to God as you pray. You can do this when walking to the bus stop, driving home or even in the middle of a disagreement.

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F

Forgive And Forget

Forgiving and forgetting is another important Christian stress management technique. Therefore, forgive the people who have hurt you and reduce the tension in your life. Release them from your mind together with the bitterness that has been binding them to your heart.

Forgive and forget because you cannot move forward with your life if you are still bogged down by betrayals from way back and distant disappointments. Leave past pains behind where they belong as you cannot change the past.

Forgive and then Forgetting those things which are behind you and reaching forward to those things which are ahead (Philippians 3:13) move forward into your future unencumbered.

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G

Get A Massage

To massage simply means to apply pressure and motion to the soft tissues of the body. This reduces tension in the muscles and thus helps you relax.

Schedule time to give yourself a scalp, face, neck or foot massage whenever you want to de-stress and relax. Enhance your experience by playing soothing music and using relaxing body oils.

If you are giving yourself a massage, avoid massaging over areas with skin diseases, swellings, recent scars, varicose veins and also over your abdomen during pregnancy.

When in doubt, consult a professional massage therapist and let them iron out the kinks in your muscles.

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H

Hope In The Lord

Hope helps your peer into the future from your present stressful situation through glasses tinged rosy-red with optimism rather than through those tinted bleak-black with pessimism.

Hope enables you to persevere and keep trying until you resolve your stressful situation. Learn how to apply this Christian stress management technique from the woman in Mark 5 who had bleed heavily for 12 years, spent all she had on doctors and yet kept getting worse.

This woman still had hope in the Lord and this is what enabled her to press through the crowd until she touched Jesus. She was healed because of her faith but she kept on pressing because of hope.

Never ever lose your hope in the Lord no matter how bleak your circumstances may be. If your hope begins to wane, ask yourself, Why are you cast down, O my soul? Why are you disquieted within me? Hope in God because I shall yet praise Him for He is the help of my countenance and my God. (Psalm 42:11)

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I

Identify Personal Stressors

Set aside time to find out exactly what is stressing you so that you can manage it well.

Is it something that happened to you? an illness, job loss, relationship problems

Is it your thoughts? self-criticism, fear, pessimism

Is it your behaviour? perfectionism, workaholism, procrastination

Is it something that happened to someone close to you? their death, disability, addiction

Is it your job? the boss, deadlines, targets

Is it your environment? insecurity, pollution

Identify your personal stressors and then prioritize them. This will help you separate the major ones that you must deal with first from the minor ones that you can deal with later.

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J

Just Say No

When you find that you are overwhelmed by other people’s demands on your resources, protect yourself by learning to say NO.

Learn to say NO to requests that waste your time and are not in line with your goals. Decline demands that leave you feeling depressed, distressed or depleted.

Learn to set limits on your space, your time, your money, your energy, your relationships and whatever else concerns you and you will markedly reduce the stress in your life.

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K

Keep The Sabbath

Remember the Sabbath day to keep it holy. For six days you shall labor and do all your work but the seventh day is the Sabbath of the Lord your God. In it you shall not work. … because in six days the Lord made the heavens and the earth, the sea, and all that is in them, and He rested the seventh day. (Exodus 20: 8-11)

Heed the Lord’s command and keep your Sundays sacred, a day dedicated to God.

Slow down on Sundays. Go to church in the morning and engage in restful activities in the afternoon to recover from the detrimental effects of the past week’s stress.

Take a breather from your regular life and its obligations. Don’t run around trying to complete office work or housework. If you must work on Sundays, then dedicate another day to the Lord so that He may renew your spirit.

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L

Laugh It Off

Laughter is another important technique for reducing stress as it relieves tension, reduces stress hormones and results in deep abdominal breathing.

Whenever you feel strained, engage in twenty minutes of hearty laughter and you will feel much better. Call an entertaining friend and listen to their humorous stories. Read hilarious books and comics. Watch videos of your favorite comedians to help you laugh it off.

Make it a habit to laugh often and you will definitely add life to your years if not years to your life.

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M

Meditate On The Word

Meditation is a very effective relaxation technique because by focusing your mind on one thought, your heart slows down, tension dissipates and your body is able to relax.

Therefore, meditate on the Word of God daily to reduce stress. You can do it the morning to get in the right frame of mind or in the evening you can Meditate within your heart on your bed, and be still. (Psalm 4:4)

Find a scripture that speaks to your stressful situation and then give it your complete attention. For example if something is terrifying you, meditate on He is a shield to those who put their trust in Him.  (Proverbs 30:5)

Contemplate it, ruminate it and believe it. If your mind wanders to your fears, reflect on the Scripture again until your attention shifts to His protection and your fears are slayed.

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